Four Impossible Things Is The New Six

on July 8, 2010 in Fantasy

“Now then,” said the Tailor to Alice, “I must measure this frock, and then we’ll know what size we must make you to fit it.”

“What?” said Alice, certain that she must have heard him incorrectly. “But doesn’t it make much more sense to measure the person and then make the clothing fit them?”

“Measure the person? Make the clothing fit? Well I’ve never heard of such a thing. What queer ideas you have,” the Tailor said.

“But a person can’t help their size,” Alice insisted. “It’s not possible.”

“Then they must be awfully lazy,” the Tailor said. “Why, if we did things your way we’d have to make clothing in every shape and size. Our work would never end. So much simpler, so much more sensible, to make our things the right size and the right shape to begin with.”

“Okay, you know what?” said Alice. “Fuck this shit, I’m going back to the place with the rabbit and the caterpillar… that world made more sense than this one.”

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5 Responses to “Four Impossible Things Is The New Six”

  1. the leaking pen says:

    but…. if six… turned out to be nine?

  2. Time Kitten says:

    Remember, all shoes are made in size six, only scaled for length.

    Having a perfect size 6 foot for that is so rare indeed that you are practically guarantied a job from it so you can decide weather shoes of all sizes are comfortable or not.

    Available in sizes 30-40, overstocked in 30, might have a pair of 40 left if you wait while the shelves are stocked.

  3. d.p says:

    absolutely brilliant.

  4. Scarlett says:

    Sounds a whole lot like real life to me.
    But very clever. 😉

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